Book review posts, Uncategorized

All About Sleep – Why We Sleep

“Why We Sleep” written by Matthew Walker, PhD was one of my top 20 books I read in 2022. Matthew Walker, PhD is a professor of neuroscience and psychology at UC Berkeley and director of its Sleep and Imaging Lab. He has published more than a hundred scientific studies. This book was PACKED with information, and I will share some of the research I found most fascinating.

Contrary to what most people believe, you cannot “catch up” on sleep by sleeping in on the weekends. It takes much longer, and consistent sleep is vital. Getting too little sleep across the adult life span significantly increases your risk of developing Alzheimer’s disease and increases the risk of cancer development. Also, the less you sleep, the more you are likely to eat, and you increase your probability of gaining weight and developing Type 2 diabetes.

Poor sleep quality increases the risk of cancer development, and, if cancer is established, provides a virulent fertilizer for its rapid and more rampant growth.

Matthew Walker, PhD

Dolphins, whales, and some birds can sleep with half a brain at a time and remain alert with the other half! In flocks of birds, with the exception of the birds at the end of the line, the rest of the group will allow both halves of the brain to indulge in sleep, while the end of the line has 1/2 brain sleeping and 1/2 alert for threat detection! Wow!

We use the term “half-life” when discussing a drug’s efficacy (length of time it takes for the body to remove 50% of a drug’s concentration). Caffeine has an average half-life of 5-7 hours, so any caffeine after noon will impact your sleep!

Decaffeinated does NOT mean uncaffeinated. One cup of decaf usually contains 15-30% of the dose of a regular cup of coffee!

The different sleep stages play different roles in information processing. The wake state is focused on reception – experiencing and constantly learning the world around you. The NREM sleep state is focused on reflection – storing and strengthening those raw ingredients of new facts and skills. The REM state is focused on integration – interconnecting these raw ingredients with each other and with past experiences, resulting in innovative insights and problem-solving abilities.

Some signs of insufficient sleep include not being able to get up on time without an alarm, having to read and reread sentences at your computer, and having standard ADHD symptoms of irritableness, moodiness, being more distractable and unfocused during the day, and having mental health instability.

Vehicle accidents caused by drowsy driving exceed those caused by alcohol and drugs combined! Driving drowsy is worse than driving drunk in that being drunk results in late response times in braking and maneuvering, whereas falling asleep results in not reacting altogether.

5 key factors have powerfully changed how much and how well we sleep: constant electric light/LED light, regularized temperature, caffeine, alcohol, and a legacy of punching time cards. This book mentioned that Edina, MN schools were one of the first to experiment with shifting the start time and reported much higher scores on SATs. Other schools have reported better GPAs.

This book also briefly discussed some sleep disorders such as insomnia and narcolepsy. Fatal familial insomnia is a rare sleep disorder caused by a mutation on chromosome 20, which makes the protein insoluble. When it converts, the protein causes plaque to form in the thalamus, which is the region responsible for the regulation of sleep. Fatal familial insomnia has no treatments or cures! I did find it interesting that Prazosin, a medication used to treat high blood pressure, is used in the treatment of repetitive trauma nightmares.

Tips for better sleep:

  1. Stick to a sleep schedule. Wake up and go to bed at the same time each day, including weekends.
  2. Try to exercise at least 30 minutes on most days but not later than 2 or 3 hours before your bedtime.
  3. Avoid caffeine in the afternoons/evenings and avoid nicotine.
  4. Avoid alcoholic drinks before bed. Heavy alcohol ingestion robs you of REM sleep and disrupts your breathing at night.
  5. Avoid large meals and beverages late at night.
  6. If possible, avoid medications that delay or disrupt your sleep. Some commonly prescribed heart, blood pressure, and asthma medications, as well as some over-the-counter and herbal remedies for coughs, colds, and allergies can disrupt sleep patterns. Talk to your doctor or pharmacist if you are having trouble sleeping to see if any of your medications may be contributing.
  7. Don’t take naps after 3 p.m.
  8. Relax and unwind before bed. A relaxing routine, such as reading or listening to music, should be part of your nightly routine.
  9. Take a hot bath before bed. The drop in body temperature after getting out of the bath may help you feel sleepy.
  10. Your bedroom should be dark, cool, and gadget-free.
  11. Get sunlight exposure during the day. Daylight is key to regulating daily sleep patterns.
  12. Don’t lie in bed awake. If you can’t fall asleep after 20 minutes, get up and do a relaxing activity until you feel sleepy. The anxiety of not being able to sleep can make it harder to fall asleep.

More information at: https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/good-nights-sleep

I learned SO much from this book, and I am just covering the tip of the iceberg. I definitely don’t currently practice all of the tips mentioned in this book, but I look forward to implementing some of them for better sleep and more energy!

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Thoughtful Thursday posts, Uncategorized

Thoughtful Thursday – February 9, 2023

My intention is to post a Thoughtful Thursday column each week and share some of the insights I have learned in the past week. Here are some of the things I’ve learned this week:

36 Things I’ve Learned in 36 Years- Healthier Together Podcast

I learned a lot from this podcast! Here are some of the 36 things mentioned on the podcast:

Ask yourself if everything that you are doing in your life is because of what you’re being told to do by society/family/friends or if it’s something you want to do.

  • Eat a small salad before a meal to make it more blood-sugar friendly. This slows the absorbance of glucose in your bloodstream.
  • Listen to podcasts or watch tv only during a workout to make working out easier.

Clean out your social media feed to include only those that make you feel good or provide value to you. If you follow celebrities that make you want their lifestyles and make you fall into the comparison trap, stop following them out of respect for your mental health.

  • While the state of the world can make it scary to have kids, in reality, people have always lived through scary times. Having a child is an act of hope in making a better world, and you’ll get through it.
  • Brush your hair before you shower. You’ll distribute the conditioning oils from your scalp and there will be fewer tangles to get out after the shower. Get a wetbrush.

The best way to not be on your phone in bed is to plug it in in another room. If your phone isn’t there, you can’t reach for it.

  • You will probably not remember everything you want to for later. Write it down or make a note on your phone or use an app. I currently send text messages to myself when needed and leave them unread for some things I want to remember to do ASAP.
  • I learned about the concept of Sound Baths to relax. These are relaxing sounds, that, when combined with headphones, can help with depression and anxiety. The Insight Timer app Sound Baths were recommended in this podcast episode, but you can also find other sounds on YouTube by searching for “sound bath.”

If you don’t put the things that you value most like relationships or self-care on your to-do list or calendar, they’ll get lost in favor of things that you ostensibly value less. It’s easy to put your relationships after everything on your to-do list. Build them into your calendar.

Ways to Save Money on a Limited Budget or Low Income-Clever Girls Know Podcast

Housing:

  • Try downsizing, rent out a room to someone, or live with a roommate.
  • Try not to spend more than 30% of your income on housing. Move to a cheaper neighborhood.
  • Also consider utility costs and property taxes when making a decision about where to live.

Food:

  • Limit how much you are eating out. Be intentional about planning when you are going out to eat. Plan a day and plan it in your budget. It’s okay to decline invites to expensive restaurants with friends or make suggestions for other restaurants if needed.
  • Look at your pantry so you aren’t buying things you already have. Not every non-perishable item is a good bulk purchase. Only buy in bulk if you will definitely use the product in time.
  • Curbside pickup and delivery help curb impulse shopping.
  • Search the internet for recipes to make with ingredients you already have.
  • Buy fresh foods and avoid pre-cut pre-packaged fresh produce that has high markups.
  • Meal plan and prep. I like to do this one or two days a week, especially on a Sunday, so that I am prepared and don’t have to think about it after work each day.

Entertainment:

  • Find free or affordable entertainment. Ex: matinee movies, Groupon, free museums on certain days, etc.
  • Look into bundling services.
  • If you have cable, make sure you aren’t paying for tiers/channels you don’t need. If you have internet, make sure you aren’t paying for speeds you don’t need.
  • Cell phone services often provide options for free entertainment. Library cards also provide free entertainment. Inquire about these benefits at your local library.
  • Shop around for car insurance, cell phone plans, and cable/internet rates yearly.

Other tips:

  • Take care of your health. Take preventative measures through exercising and eating right. Eating healthy may be more expensive, but your health needs will be less expensive in the long-term.
  • Using a cash envelope system with pre-set budgets can create more mindful spending. You can use this for most categories or just those you struggle with most. Ex: groceries, eating out, or entertainment.
  • You can only cut back so much. Look at the life skills you have that you can use to generate more income. Don’t be embarrassed to work a part-time job to live the life you want to.
How Working As A Collections Agent Helped Paco Understand the Emotions People Have About Money- Clever Girls Know Podcast

This podcast was particularly interesting to me because I spent about six years working in the creditors’ rights legal industry. Prior to starting in that industry, I HATED talking about finances and tried to avoid it. However, after learning about the struggles people faced and different financial priorities and consequences, such as lawsuits, bank garnishments, and wage garnishments, I became determined to work three jobs and be frugal so that I could pay off my student loan debt early (in 3 years) and save for a wedding, better vehicle, and a downpayment for a house. Since then, it has been my goal to live debt-free as much as I can. Here are my take-aways from this episode:

When receiving collections calls, the top emotions people go through are embarrassment (forgetting about their payment or being seen as irresponsible), anger (co-signing and later regretting it), shame, and guilt. Asking people “Why are you late on your payment?” made the host experience emotions about money and gain empathy.

There are grace periods. Usually only payments that are late 30 days are reported to the credit bureaus. If you are late because of your income, work on fixing that and increasing your income instead of cutting back on expenses. Look into getting an extension or finding a program that can help you if needed. Sometimes people are caught in a repeating cycle that you can’t completely resolve, such as when people roll over car loans when trading in or getting another vehicle.

Your potential for change is limitless. You have the power to change your emotions about finances and meet your financial goals.

Chipotle: Steve Ells (2017)- How I Built This with Guy Raz

Chipotle holds a special place in my heart, as I worked at a very busy Chipotle part-time for three years, I often make Chipotle’s recipes of fajita veggies, cilantro lime rice, and guacamole, and I still consider Chipotle my favorite restaurant!

Steve Ells, the founder of Chipotle, went to culinary school. One day, he visited a taqueria and thought about opening his own taqueria to make enough money to open a fine dining restaurant. He wanted to open in Boulder, Colorado, but he couldn’t find a good location. He visited with a real estate broker and told him about his concept of an open kitchen, grilled meats, and fresh veggies and herbs on an assembly line, and he found an old building at University of Denver for about $80k in 1993 that needed renovations.

Steve wanted to be frugal. Table bases were made with pipes, the service counter was faced with barn metal, and he wanted stainless steel on top of plywood for tables. His idea was to have one restaurant as a cash cow to help support a full-scale restaurant.

He knew from his culinary experiences that he wanted to use chipotle peppers as an ingredient and that’s how he came up with the name Chipotle. He didn’t have recipes. Instead, he used techniques he learned in culinary school and emphasized tasting food after making it. He opened with a handful of people and had some friends work the line.

On opening day, sales were about $240. The turning point was in October 1993, when a restaurant reviewer for the Rocky Mountain news gave a glowing review, stating that “Chipotle is unlike any fast food you’ve had. Everything has depth, character, nuance, and layers of flavor.” This review resulted in a line out the door and ultimately the restaurant ran out of food. Chipotle could not keep up with the demand. Chipotle was profitable within the first few months.

Eventually Chipotle expanded nationwide and created a business plan. At one point, for seven years, McDonald’s owned a majority (92%) of Chipotle, but the businesses cut ties due to different priorities.

In October-November 2015, 52 people got sick with e-coli. Chipotle later developed safety practices such as blanching avocados, lemons, limes, and peppers.

Steve Ells acknowledged that he was lucky to have a father who could invest $85k into his first restaurant and lucky that McDonald’s was willing to invest. He was in the right place at the right time, although he emphasized that his plan failed in a sense because he wanted to be able to have one restaurant and walk away from it. Chipotle instead expanded so much that he didn’t take time off in the first year, and Chipotle now has over 2,600 locations! Steve Ells stepped away from Chipotle in 2020 and is now involved in real estate investments.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Book review posts, Uncategorized

No Such Thing As Normal

“No Such Thing As Normal” was written by Bryony Gordon, founder of Mental Health Mates in the UK, an organization that hosts walking meet-ups to talk about mental health. I am grateful that I generally don’t struggle with mental health, but I still gained insights from this book.

**WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU IS NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. WHAT OTHER PEOPLE DO IS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY.**

Bryony Gordon

I wish I had read this sooner! Also, if someone tells you or shows you who they are, and you don’t like it, do NOT waste time and energy trying to make them like you. The single most important factor for your well-being is not what other people think of you; it is what you think of yourself.

Worrying about the thing is almost always worse than the thing itself. This is SO true!

Instead of asking yourself “What if it all goes wrong?” ask yourself “What if it all goes right?”

Put your own mask on before attempting to help anyone else with theirs. Take care of yourself. However, if you have time to help others, it’s very hard to feel useless when you are being useful.

Things will get better when you do the work. Exercise can be one of the most important tools for helping mental illness. How to get through bad days: make a plan for each day, contact at least one person, go outside, be patient, and think about what you CAN control.

Never say anything to yourself you would not say to someone else.

Tips for better sleep: get into a routine, read before bed, and do breathing exercises.

Most people with mental health issues have to jump through hoops to get anywhere near treatment. So perhaps we should stop marginalizing and stereotyping them as weak and instead recognize them for their absolutely mind-bending strength.

There is no such thing as normal.

There were SO many resources provided in this book. However, they were all in the UK since the author lives in the UK.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Book review posts, Uncategorized

All About High Performance Habits

I recently read “High Performance Habits” written by Brendon Burchard, the world’s leading high performance coach and one of the most watched, quoted, and followed personal development trainers in history. I highly recommend this book!

The gist of this book is that, to become a high performer, you must seek clarity, generate energy, raise necessity, increase productivity, develop influence, and demonstrate courage.

Seek clarity on who you want to be, how you want to interact with others, what you want, and what will bring you the greatest meaning. As every project begins, ask yourself: “What kind of person do I want to be while I’m doing this? How should I treat others? What are my intentions and objectives? What can I focus on that will bring me a sense of connection and fulfillment? Consistently seek clarity.”

Generate energy so that you can maintain focus, effort, and well-being.

If you want to feel more energized, creative, and effective at work – and still leave work with enough oomph for the ‘life’ part, the ideal breakpoint is to stop your work and give your mind and body a break every 45-60 minutes.”

Brendon Burchard

Get up, walk around, and fill up your water.

If the demands of your job or life require you to learn fast, deal with stress, be alert, pay attention, remember important things, and keep a positive mood, then you must take exercise more seriously. If you care about your contribution to the world, you’ll care about yourself.”

Brendon Burchard

Raise necessity. For exceptional performance, know your whys – internal and external. Internal whys may include your identity, your standards, and your obsessions. External whys may include real deadlines, your social duty, and your sense of obligation and purpose. To raise necessity:

  • High necessity= “I feel a deep emotional drive and commitment to succeeding, and it consistently forces me to work hard, stay disciplined, and push myself.”
  • Know who needs your A game. With multiple priorities, consider “Who needs me on my A game the most right now?”
  • “Have I associated the important activities of my day with my identity and my sense of obligation?”

Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.

Pablo Picasso

Increase productivity in your primary field of interest. Slow down, be more strategic, and say no more often. Take ownership of your day.

Develop influence with those around you. Develop a positive support network. People support what they create. Ask people what they want, how they’d like to work together, and what outcomes they care about.

To gain influence with others, teach them how to think about themselves, others, and the world; challenge them to develop their character, connections, and contributions; and role model the values you wish to see them embody. High performers have discovered that it is by connecting with others that they learn more about themselves and the world.

Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.

Amy Poehler

Demonstrate courage by expressing your ideas and taking action despite uncertainty. You are capable of remarkable things that you could never foretell and will never discover without taking action.” What leaps could you take now?

Passion + Growth + Contribution = Personal Satisfaction

Enthusiasm + Connection + Satisfaction + Coherence = Meaning

If you want to be a high performer, show up and bring the joy. High performers cultivate joy by how they think, what they focus on, and how they engage in and reflect on their days.

When people say “I can’t,” it usually means “I am unwilling to do the long-term training and conditioning necessary to achieve that.” Everything is trainable.

High performers are learners, and their belief that they can learn what is necessary to win in the future gives them as much confidence as their current skillsets.”

Brendon Burchard

Between each task in your day, remember this: *RELEASE TENSION, SET INTENTION*

Don’t bring tension to all future aspects of your day. How many times have we been guilty of having a rough morning and carrying it into all aspects of our day? Have you had a conversation or meeting that didn’t pan out the way you wanted it to and resulted in you carrying frustration or resentment toward those involved? Have you had a rough day at work and carried it into your relationships at home?

High performers have shaped their identity by conscious will and have aligned their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors to support that identity.

Brendon Burchard

Superior-minded people are certain they are better, more capable, and more deserving, and it’s that certainty that closes their minds to learning, connection with others, and growth. Stay humble. If you’re going to maintain high performance, you need to avoid the traps of superiority, dissatisfaction, and neglect.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Thoughtful Thursday posts, Uncategorized

Thoughtful Thursday – February 2, 2023

My intention is to post a Thoughtful Thursday column each week and share some of the insights I have learned in the past week. Here are some of the things I’ve learned this week:

“What’s New?” – Self Improvement Daily

A question that we often ask each other to catch up is “What’s new?”. The question is well-intended but the response is usually underwhelming – “Work is good, family is good, all’s good!”

Brian Ford

“What’s new?” is an opportunity to share what you’re excited about, what is changing in your life, or what you’re working on. If you’re pursuing the best version of yourself, there should always be something new going on to share.

The next time someone asks you “What’s new?”, instead of giving the same generic response, tell them what you’re working on, what is changing in your life, or what you’re excited about. Use it as an opportunity to share.

On Purpose with Jay Shetty- 6 Ways to Know if You’re Compatible with Someone + 4 Steps to Build Real Connection

Chemistry does not equal compatibility. Chemistry is like lighting a matchstick. It burns and runs out. Compatibility is like a candle that burns slowly and takes much longer to run out.

Jay Shetty

Compatibility does NOT mean the same personality. You can have a lot in common personality-wise, but have massively different expectations and input that don’t make you compatible. A lot of people want their partner to have the same exact interests as them. You aren’t trying to date yourself! “We’re so different” is not what leads to distance.

Compatibility does not mean it is easy to get along. It requires deeper understanding and knowledge, which often requires discomfort. Compatibility requires discomfort.

Jay Shetty

Compatibility does NOT require changing someone else.

Most of us believe that the way WE were raised is the right way to do things. You’ve built a home full of your ideas, and when you get into a relationship, you tend to want your partner to live in your house with your ideas and thoughts, and they want to live in their house with their ideas. Getting in a relationship requires you to build your own house together with bricks from each one.

Steps to build compatibility:

  • RARE:
    • Recognize differences. Know where that person is different. Ex: Organized vs. spontaneous
    • Awareness of their stance and why. Where did it come from and why are they that way? Compatibility means I know why I am the way I am, and I know why my partner is the way they are. Compatibility requires that you have an awareness of why someone makes the choices they’re making.
    • Respect their approach.
    • Express your feelings without feeling judged. It takes time and skill.

Think of this: Are you able to recognize my differences, be aware of how I think and why I think that way, respect that, and let me express myself without feeling judged? Can we do this daily and get better at it? Are we willing to do the work to be together? It’s NOT “Are we right for each other?” Instead, it’s “Do we want to be right for each other?”

Areas of compatibility:

Wealth compatibility- does not mean you have the same views about $ or finances. Do we understand why each of us thinks about $ in this way? What is the solution we want to create together?

Beauty- If you’re together, how do you feel about yourself?

Power- knowing which partner is good at what and letting them lead in that area. People often criticize their partners in public. How does your partner want to be acknowledged and appreciated?

Renunciation- letting your partner grow at their own pace. Use encouragement, guidance, love, and support, not force. Their path is different than yours.

Knowledge compatibility- trying to learn new things with each other or learning new things separately and sharing your learnings.

Harvard Business Review Ideacast- Why Some Start-Ups Fail to Scale

Common reasons why start-ups fail to scale:

  • Can’t source enough supply to keep up with the demand
  • Problems securing capital to the point where the business becomes cash-flow positive
  • Not having sufficiently coherent culture/efforts not aligned when increasing number of staff
  • Attempting to scale into a market that isn’t big enough to justify their scale/don’t have practical or feasible means to reach their target market when scaling

Start-ups need an effective way to get to their target market/market strategy, an idea of the approach to monetization, capital investment, a strategy to hit milestones that will get them capital investment, and need a plan for sustainability.

Case example: Wayfair. Wayfair started with multiple specific websites for each type of products. They eventually realized that, in order to have repeat customers, they needed to merge into one website: Wayfair.

Taken from Wayfair.com:

“Niraj and Steve jumped in, looking at what people were searching for and building destinations for those products. Soon they had launched CSN Stores, a collection of more than 200 sites with everything from bar stools to bedroom furniture and birdhouses.

In 2011, we brought everything together under one roof and created wayfair.com: a single site where people could find millions of products for every part of their homes.”

One of my favorite television shows is Shark Tank. I love to get an inside look at entrepreneurship and venture capital, and I find it fascinating to learn about new products, successes and challenges, and negotiations. I often find myself evaluating whether I think a product is going to become useful and popular, whether it is a product that allows the company to have repeat customers, whether I think the entrepreneurs should give up a certain percentage of their company to investors, etc. Many entrepreneurs on the show have issues sourcing supply to keep up with the demand, problems securing capital, difficulty trying to become cash-flow positive, and attempting to scale into a market that isn’t big enough.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Book review posts, Uncategorized

The Burnout Epidemic + What Can Be Done

“The Burnout Epidemic: The Rise of Chronic Stress and How We Can Fix It” by Jennifer Moss was among my top 20 favorite books I read in 2022. Jennifer Moss is an award-winning journalist, author and international public speaker.

Packed with insightful research and data, this book examined what causes burnout and what organizations can do to prevent it, how companies can build an anti-burnout strategy, and how leaders can measure burnout in their own organizations. I will note that this book surprisingly focused more on organizations and leaders instead of the typical self-care ideas.

  • There are 6 causes of burnout:
    • Workload
    • Perceived lack of control
    • Lack of reward or recognition
    • Poor work relationships
    • Lack of fairness
    • Values mismatch

Leaders should ask themselves “How do we create a better, healthier workplace for people so they don’t burn out?” “Empathy drives great leadership. If that tenet is at the root of our decision making, we are more likely to prevent burnout because the pro-social payoffs are plenty.”

Jennifer Moss

MOTIVATION factors include challenging work, recognition for one’s achievements, responsibility, the opportunity to do something meaningful, involvement in decision making, and a sense of importance to the organization.

HYGIENE factors include salary, work conditions, company policy and administration, supervision, working relationships, and status and security.

“Often, employees don’t recognize when an organization has good hygiene, but bad hygiene can cause a major distraction.”

Jennifer Moss

Tips for leaders to help avoid burnout: focus on strengths, increase training, provide resources and support, give everyone a voice to share concerns or ideas, recognize hard work, and check in frequently but don’t micromanage.

Perfectionists (me!): stop trying to control everything, understand the difference between self-knowledge and self-awareness, accept help, and take care of yourselves so that you can take care of others.

In cases of workload burnout, ask yourself: “Is what I’m doing helping or harming me? Do I continue to raise my hand even though I know I should focus on accomplishing my current workload? Do I communicate to others when I feel like it’s too much? Do I delegate well? Have I identified what gives me energy and what drains me? Do I manage my distractions? Do I have outside interests or do I give my life to work? Do I have a close friend at work I can lean on for support?”

Working from home at the start of the COVID-19 pandemic was tough. I was suddenly working and quarantining in my small one-bedroom apartment at the time, and it was hard to separate work life from my home life since I was always home. The couch I sat on to read or watch tv was the same seat I sat on to work all day. As client demands increased, and training a colleague from home was not an option, my workload continued to pile up. There were many times I worked all day, took a break for supper, and then worked at night to keep up with the new demands. Without a social life or many hobbies, and with businesses closed, my work was my life. Some days I felt like I didn’t do anything exciting or anything for MYSELF; when I reflected on my day, all I could think about was work. My perception of my day was solely focused on my reflection of work that day.

I knew I needed a change, so eventually, I started focusing on daily habits or doing something for myself each day. I started with reading every day, later added listening to a podcast each day, and eventually added exercising each day. With businesses closed, I started walking on a walking path near my apartment to exercise each day, and on the walking path, I made a nearby friend who happened to work at the same company as I did! We were able to meet and go on walks for 3-5 miles most evenings. Getting out in nature while socializing quickly became the best part of my days and the best form of stress relief.

In 2022, I had focused extensively on forming daily habits. It was a life-changing year, and it helped me to cultivate passions outside of work. Sure, work was very stressful at times, but I took pride in looking back on my days knowing that I had done several things for ME. Through some career changes, I am also grateful to have found an organization that is invested in preventing employee burnout.

Some things are out of your control, but YOU can and should take action on the things that ARE in your control to prevent burnout.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Thoughtful Thursday posts, Uncategorized

Thoughtful Thursday- January 26, 2023

My intention is to post a Thoughtful Thursday column each week and share some of the insights I have learned in the past week. Here are some of the things I’ve learned this week:

Ted Health- How to Manage Your Stress Like an ER Doctor

When people ask how others have been, “crazy busy” is a common answer. “Crazy busy” mode means you are less capable of handling the busy. The truth is, you can be as busy as an emergency department without being crazy busy. Instead of “crazy busy,” ready mode means you are ready for whatever comes at you, and you are capable of handling it.

Just as ER doctors do, we need to relentlessly triage. Crazy busy involves reacting to every challenge with the same response. Ready mode involves triaging and prioritizing by degrees of urgency. Individuals who react to everything with the same response have double the level of stress hormones.

Triage:

Red- immediately life-threatening

Yellow- serious, but not immediately life-threatening

Green- minor

Black- for patients for whom there is nothing ER doctors can do. We must move on.

We each have our own black tasks in our lives – items that we must take off of our lists. If you try to do everything, you have no hope of saving your “reds.”

Part of the problem in crazy busy mode is that you are reacting to everything as if it is red. Start by triaging. Know your “reds.”

To avoid burnout, design your life to make tasks easier to do. Find ways to reduce daily decisions, such as meal planning and prepping for the week during the weekend. Automate any recurring bills. Habit stack (ex: listen to a podcast while getting ready for work, clean or do dishes while your food is in the oven, etc.) Time block for single tasks and eliminate distractions.

Own the busy, but stop calling it crazy.

Self Improvement Daily- Setting the Tone for the Day

“When you snooze and delay starting the day, you’re giving yourself permission to allow your emotions to affect your decision making. This often causes you to start the day running behind, which then is an energy that affects how you show up to everything else.”

Self Improvement Daily Podcast

Pre-determine 5 minutes of activity that begins the second your alarm goes off, don’t check your phone, and avoid social media right away in the morning. Instead, stick to a pre-planned routine to set your intentions for the day. I have also heard in a different podcast that sitting up and drinking a glass of water while in bed right when your alarms goes off aids in waking you up quickly.

I have been snoozing the alarm regularly lately, and I will be trying these tips soon!

7 Fat Loss Tips We Can Learn From Bodybuilders- Optimal Health Daily

Protein should be first priority! Choose lean meats.

Replace more complex carbs with fibrous veggies.

Do cardio first thing in the morning on an empty stomach.

Hydrate adequately. Getting enough water is essential to obtaining your fat loss results. Water should be 90% of the liquid you drink each day.

On Purpose Podcast with Jay Shetty- 6 Scientifically Proven Ways to Improve Work-Life Balance

Build skills and learn more to create more meaning from work. Are you realizing your potential at work? Skills result in increased productivity and effectiveness and therefore decrease stress.

Flexibility and autonomy generate satisfaction with work-life balance. Look for roles that offer flexibility and autonomy.

Take time to do things that are refreshing. Do something for yourself each day. Get outside in nature during the day, and if you can’t, go to a window and look outside often.

Switch away from to-do lists and toward time blocking to focus on individual tasks without distractions.

Focus on the relationships at work as much as the work itself.

Runner’s World Magazine article- Run 26.2 Miles on a Glacier by Elizabeth L. Silver

I learned about the 7 Continents Marathon Club, which currently consists of 407 members! From the website (icemarathon.com): “The Club is unique, reserved for athletes who have run a marathon within the Antarctic Circle on the Antarctica continent, as well as on the other six continents.” The Antarctic marathon costs $21,500 alone + some travel expenses, so many runners are sponsored by athletic apparel companies.

I also came across this YouTube video in which marathoners run 7 marathons in 7 continents in 7 days, starting with Antarctica!

I have never run a marathon, but I found this inspiring and fascinating.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Book review posts, Uncategorized

Embrace Your Almost + You Are On Time for Your Own Life

“Embrace Your Almost” written by Jordan Lee Dooley was one of my top 20 books of 2022.  Jordan is the host of the SHE podcast and owner of SoulScripts, a words company known for its phrase “Your brokenness is welcome here.” Using examples such as growing a garden, pregnancy loss, closing a business, moving, and a change in career, this book contained helpful perspectives about the almost-but-not-quite experiences we face.

“Every struggle and setback along the way made me the woman I am today. Without almost-but-not-quite experiences, I might never have slowed down, reconsidered what matters to me, developed deeper empathy, and refocused on my priorities.”

Jordan Lee Dooley

Years ago, I was in an extensive hiring process for over seven months for a career I was very excited about. I spent seven months envisioning this new life moving across the country, working long hours, and being in an honorable position. The role didn’t come to fruition, and I was heartbroken and frustrated. After having read and learned more about it, I frequently reflect about my experience and am grateful that it didn’t work out. The setback allowed me to slow down, reconsider my priorities, and prioritize what is best for me and my family. I now have a job I have wanted for years, a great work-life balance, and was able to stay in Minnesota with my husband and family.

Sometimes when we find ourselves stuck between where we started and where we want to be, we focus so much on the life we WANT to have that we fail to appreciate the one we DO have. We can be successful and create beautiful lives EVEN when a specific goal or dream takes longer to achieve or doesn’t work out exactly how we planned. We just have to look at success differently.

Life is more like a garden to tend than a game to win. One of my favorite quotes is “Bloom where you are planted.” In the face of disappointment, ask yourself: “What do I truly want? Why do I want it? How am I going to steward it?” If you’re letting go of a dream, identify what matters most and why, evaluate and seek counsel, and make a plan for the open space on your plate. Are there things you’ve always wanted to do but never had time for?

Maybe the secret to contentment isn’t found when we get something we want easily and on the first try. Instead, maybe contentment grows in all the hard moments that break us down along the way.

Jordan Lee Dooley

Unexpected gains come out of difficult experiences:

  1. empathy
  2. patience
  3. clarity (pause and reconsider what matters)
  4. discernment (what’s worth your time/which options align with your values/who you’re willing to trust or listen to)
  5. intentionality

Do you ever believe the lie that when you get “here” or “there,” you’ll finally be successful – only to realize you’re chasing a moving target? Do you ever have a hard time discerning which dreams are truly yours, which just sound fun, and which are the result of pressure that society or someone else has put on you? We often only get clarity through adversity. Sometimes what looks like a setback can actually be a setup.

It’s easy to fall into the comparison trap. We see people are “ahead” of us in terms of marriage, children, home ownership, careers, finances, health, etc. The author discussed with her friends and found “just as I felt behind in one area of life, women all around me felt behind in another area.” This is eye-opening. Plus, the sense of having it all and having it all together can shatter in the blink of an eye.

The comparison trap reminded me of a podcast episode I recently listened to, Your Mind Matters. The episode was titled “You are on time for your own life.”

“Just because your life doesn’t look like someone else’s doesn’t mean that you are falling behind, doesn’t mean that you aren’t accomplishing enough, doesn’t mean that you are doomed, doesn’t mean that you are setting yourself up for failure. It just means that someone else’s journey doesn’t look like yours and that’s okay.”

“Your Mind Matters podcast”

How boring would it be if your life looked exactly like everyone else’s? How boring would it be if you got exactly what you wanted when you wanted it? You would get bored so quickly! You are on time for your own life. Someone else’s life timeline and accomplishments have nothing to do with you.

This resonates with me. Growing up, I had determined timelines in mind for when I would get married, when I would have an established long-term career, when I would have kids, etc. I didn’t meet any of those timelines and fell into the comparison trap because others I grew up with or graduated with had accomplished those things. I felt behind in life. After reflecting, I am grateful for the timing I have experienced. I had different priorities than my preset timelines and experienced exponential learning and personal growth along the way.

This was an eye-opening Christian book that caused me to reflect on some of my almost-but-not-quite experiences and how they shaped who I am and brought clarity to my life and priorities.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Book review posts, Uncategorized

Brilliant Insights From “Tribe of Mentors” by Timothy Ferriss + My Mentor

One of my favorite books from 2022 was Tribe of Mentors by Timothy Ferriss. Tim tracked down more than 100 experts to navigate life and included nearly 600 pages of their recommendations. I have always tried to take away at least one thing from one person (the author) with each book I’ve read, so having over 100 people offer input in this book was amazing!

One piece of advice that SO many mentors gave that changed their lives was to learn how to say NO without guilt, pressure, or obligation. This is relevant to work, social outings, opportunities, and every other aspect of life.

This is a lesson that so many people could find useful. In the past, I had often felt overwhelmed with obligations, and now I am more careful with how I spend my time and energy and whom I spend my time with.

“Busy is a decision. You don’t find the time to do something. You make the time to do things.”

Debbie Millman

This was a lesson increasingly evident with the COVID-19 pandemic. Finding ourselves with extra time due to the lack of social events, commute, and, for some, their jobs, did not always result in doing the things we had been procrastinating on that we had always said we would do “if we had more time.” I think COVID-19 really taught us what our priorities are with our time.

from Debbie Millman- Career questions to ask yourself: Am I spending enough time on looking for, finding, and working toward a great job? Am I constantly refining and improving my skills? What can I continue to get better and more competitive at? Do I believe that I am working harder than everyone else? If not, what else can I be doing? What are the people who are competing with me doing that I’m not doing?

from Arianna Huffington- “Burnout is not the price you have to pay for success.” When we prioritize our well-being, our performance goes up across the board.

When you feel overwhelmed or unfocused, ask yourself these questions: Sleep? Exercise? Healthy food? Am I resentful because I’m not setting or holding a boundary?

Brene Brown

from Leo Babauta- “Don’t try to find your passion… if you continue to optimize your mastery, you’ll eventually arrive at your passion.” “Make yourself proud.” We spend too much time trying to please everyone and we forget that it’s all already within.

from Jerome Jarre- “Promoting unethical or unhealthy companies for $ is not success. It’s corruption of your belief system and legacy.” He turned down a $1 million Snapchat series contract to promote Sour Patch Kids!

This is admirable. It bothers me when I see influencers promote items that they likely don’t personally use. Going against your belief system and promoting products you don’t use but are paid to promote is not influencing; it is dishonest and inauthentic.

“Don’t let the weight of fear weigh down the joy of curiosity.”

Jerome Jarre

from Mark Bell- “Either you’re in, or you’re in the way.” Often, we chase after people who aren’t “in” and don’t fit into our lives or business. We waste time with these people when our focus should be on the people who are in.”

“Think of your time like a jar, your priorities as rocks, and everything else as pebbles or sand.” Are you going to fill it with your rocks or let others fill it with theirs? Schedule specific blocks of time in advance for your rocks. Learn to say no. You don’t owe anyone lengthy explanations.

David Houston

from Scott Belsky- “I am always surprised by how lazy people are when making serious decisions about their careers. Join a team not for what it is, but for what you think you can help it become. You must seize the opportunities when they present themselves, not when they are convenient or obvious. The only way to cultivate your own luck is to be more flexible (you’ll need to give up something for the right opportunity), humble (timing is out of your control), and gracious (when you see it, seize it!). Life’s greatest opportunities run on their schedule, not yours.”

This really resonated with me. We often wait for the “perfect” time to make a change: the perfect time to change jobs, the perfect time to have kids, the perfect time to start a hobby or start working out… The perfect time will never arrive. We need to make sacrifices and take opportunities as they come.

from Dr. Gabor Mate- “Just say no” is the least helpful advice one can say to a person caught up in any addiction. If you want to help people, ask why they are in so much pain that they are driven to escape it through ultimately self-harming habits or substances. Then support them in healing the trauma, a process that starts with non-judgmental curiosity and compassion.”

I highly recommend this book! The best outcome is that everyone will find different things that speak to them!

One of my mentors is my former college professor/advisor/work study supervisor, Dr. DeWitt. He helped guide me through many challenges of college and helped me in my career discernment process. He really shaped who I am today.

Wit from Dr. DeWitt: Dr. DeWitt ended every class with “Any questions, concerns, or editorial comments?”

Although many of us found this ending to be solely entertaining, I also found it to be a sign of a great leader. With this ending, he showed that he was open to questions, he was open to feedback, and he was open to learning or being corrected with editorial comments. We should all strive to be open to questions, feedback, learning, and being corrected, and this remark has resonated with me since I first heard it.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!

Thoughtful Thursday posts, Uncategorized

Thoughtful Thursday- January 19, 2023

My intention is to post a Thoughtful Thursday column each week and share some of the insights I have learned in the past week. Here are some of the things I’ve learned this week:

Self Improvement Daily- The Reason Ships Sink

https://www.selfimprovementdailytips.com/podcast/the-reason-ships-sink

A ship’s primary purpose is to stay afloat. “Ships don’t sink because of the water around them. They sink because they get water in them.”

This also applies to you and the influences of your life. “Like a ship on top of water, you must navigate the danger, temptation, and vices around you without letting them affect you.” You must keep the negative influences out of your life if you want to stay afloat.

I am currently reading High Performance Habits by Brendon Burchard. One concept that really resonated with me is that when switching between tasks/meetings/rooms, we need to remember to pause and RELEASE TENSION, SET INTENTION.

Don’t bring tension to all future aspects of your day. How many times have we been guilty of having a rough morning and carrying it into all aspects of our day? Have you had a conversation or meeting that didn’t pan out the way you wanted it to and resulted in you carrying frustration or resentment toward those involved? Have you had a rough day at work and carried it into your relationships at home?

RELEASE TENSION, SET INTENTION.

On Purpose Podcast with Jay Shetty- 3 Ways to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone


Frames of mind that hold us back: “We have always done it that way.” “If it’s not broken, don’t fix it.”

What are your blind spots? What is it that challenged you before that you have now conquered? What is the area in your life where you’re getting comfortable and complacent where you don’t want to be? How many of your best moments came from something that was uncomfortable at first?

Growth requires discomfort.

From the Jordan Harbinger Show- Banned Foods

The European Union has banned aspartame, which is one of the primary sweeteners used in the United States for diet sodas and sugar-free items.

Potassium bromate is banned in Canada, China, and the European Union, but is found in the United States in some breakfast sandwiches, pizza rolls, wheat breads, and other items using bleached flour. Potassium bromate has been linked to kidney and nervous system damage, thyroid problems, gastrointestinal discomfort, and cancer.

Olestra is a synthetic cooking oil used as a calorie-free fat substitute in various foods, such as French fries and fat-free potato chips. It is banned in Canada and the European Union, and it inhibits your body’s ability to absorb vitamins.

I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!