“God Never Blinks: 50 Lessons for Life’s Little Detours” was written by Regina Brett, and most of these essays originally appeared in the Plain Dealer (Cleveland) or the Beacon Journal. The author always thought that God must have blinked when she arrived because she ended up confused by nuns at age 6, became a lost soul who drank too much at 16, an unwed mother at 21, a college graduate at 30, a single mother for 18 years, a wife at 40, and got cancer at 41. Here are some of my favorite lessons from the book:
Reframe your mindset. Instead of saying you “have to,” say you “get to.” “I get to go to work today.” “I get to get groceries.”
No one else is in charge of your happiness. You are the CEO of your joy. It takes work to rewire your thoughts about yourself, but when you do, everything in your life changes for the better, especially your most intimate relationships. Get up, dress up, and show up. Do the best you can do today.
Living an abundant life doesn’t mean winning the lottery, marrying rich, or getting a raise. It starts with a raise in consciousness and spreads from there. It starts with knowing that what you want isn’t always what you need and often isn’t what you truly want. It starts with making smart choices that lead to long-term gratification.
When an argument has reached an impasse, get comfortable with saying “You aren’t going to convince me and I’m not going to convince you, so let’s agree to disagree.”
“How will I ever believe that I am good enough?” – By helping others believe that they are good enough.
Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful, or joyful. Decluttering forces you to let go of the past and creates an opening for the future. When you finally let go of the person you used to be, you get to discover the person you are now and the person you want to become.
Ground rules for relationships – use the mnemonic SAFE:
- Secret – can the relationship pass public scrutiny? If a relationship has to be kept a secret, you don’t belong in it.
- Abusive – does it harm or degrade you or your children in any way?
- Feelings – are you in the relationship to avoid painful feelings? Is it a mood-altering relationship?
- Empty – is it empty of caring and commitment?
Stay away from unavailable people, keep no secrets, beware of addictions, be the real deal, tell the world what you want in a partner, ignore the wrapper (a tender heart will outlive the washboard tummy), and create a greater you.
How not to write (the condensed version): wait until you have children, wait until they go off to college, wait until you have two hours of uninterrupted time to write, wait until you retire, wait until a doctor says you have six months to live, then die with your words still inside of you.
It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. Go for it. This one is up to you.
3 simple steps can change your life:
- Choose something you need to say no to – no to an unhealthy relationship, projects that don’t need to be done by you, people who ask you to donate your time and talent to one more committee or commitment.
- Choose one things you need and want to say yes to. Say yes to what enhances your life and the world around you.
- Share those two things – the yes and no – with your biggest cheerleader.
If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. You already gave it to yourself. You don’t ask, you don’t get.
A 40th birthday gift idea for a spouse was to gather 40 letters/cards about how he/she impacted their lives. Too often we don’t hear what we mean to others until it is too late. If you keep your friends high on the priority list, even if you lose your health, you’ll still have what matters most. Your job won’t take care of you when you’re sick, but your friends will. Stay in touch with them.
Read the Psalms. No matter what your faith, they cover every human emotion. They offer praises as well as curses, consolation, desolation, boasts of strength, and cries of weakness and also reveal the many faces of God: powerful rock, shepherd, companion, comforter, provider, host, creator, judge, advocate, and deliverer.
Have a personal mission statement. The author’s personal mission statement is the Prayer of Saint Francis of Assisi.
I look forward to reading, learning, and sharing more with you soon!
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